15 things I’ve Learned About Life & Love While Separated

Things I’ve learned in the past 387 days that may help someone else not go through this. 


  1. Never take your spouse’s loyalty or the sacredness of your marriage vows for granted.
  2. When you stop focusing on others, on what they should or shouldn’t be doing, analyzing motivations and actions, you have more time to focus on yourself and the changes that you need to make within.
  3. Learning to love and trust yourself is the largest part of your (and my own) recovery. 
  4. Learning to listen to your intuition again is difficult but it will happen.
  5. You can’t play the victim and sit around feeling sorry for yourself. You’re better than that. Find shit to do!
  6. You deserve to be with someone who knows that the time you are together is precious and a gift to both of you.
  7. You have to accept the reality of who the people that you love are, instead of expecting and demanding that they be who you want them to be.
  8. You are responsible for the choices you make, even the ones you don’t like the outcome of.
  9. If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck…it’s probably a duck. Trust your instinct.
  10. LISTEN TO YOUR GUT!! (I’ve mentioned this 3x people)
  11. Sometimes, ignorance is bliss.
  12. You are a good person and you deserve to be treated well by the one you love.
  13. You can only control yourself, not others.
  14. Sometimes you just have to let go, even if it’s a gradual piece at a time.
  15. You cannot change the past, only the future.

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